Monday, October 25, 2010

The Ostrich Pulls her Head out of the Sand...

When I was adding the link to Ironwood Cancer and Research Center in one of my posts, I decided to look around and clicked on Esophageal Cancer.  Now I could tell from the reactions of all the doctors that are caring for me, that this was a pretty nasty cancer.
I was not prepared to see that only 5% of people survive to five years post diagnosis.  What amazes me, is that when I READ it, it scares the crap out of me, but as soon as I put it aside, it just becomes numbers and statistics, and … hey, someone DOES survive, and why can’t that someone be ME?  Hope that doesn’t sound selfish.
I think at the beginning, I didn’t want to know anything about stages and my chances of survival because I didn’t pay attention to that stuff with the BC, and I got through it with flying colors.  And in the general scheme of things lots more people GET BC, and so more research has been done to cure and/or control it.
Esophageal cancer is relatively rare.  Estimated new cases in the United States in 2010 (of which I am now one) will be 16,640.  This is from the National Cancer Institute.  14,500 people will die from this cancer in 2010.
I know this posting isn’t exactly in keeping with my normal positive writing, but I needed to put it there, type it, see it, and not be afraid of it.  I am not afraid of it.  Not thrilled in any sense of the word, but certainly no longer afraid to know the truth about it.  I am ‘strong like bull.’
And now, I can just get on with the fight.  The truth is out, and when you think about it, they’ve been telling me for quite a while that my lungs would shorten my lifespan, so I have, for a good long time, now, taken living as an amazing gift.  That won’t change.  And although there will probably be quite a few unpleasant things in store for me, I still have my family, my wonderful friends, Chihuahua slobber, beautiful Arizona skies, my hibiscus, and the trees in my back yard.   I can still write, I can still read, I can still watch The Food Networks and eat vicariously through them. :D

No comments:

Post a Comment

Labels

"The Big C" (1) 120 degrees (1) accommodation (2) Adrenal Gland (2) Adult Day Care (1) Aetna (3) Ague (1) Ahi Tuna (1) air quality (2) albuterol (6) Aloxi (1) amazon parrot (1) Americans with Disabiliites Act (1) Andy Whitfield (1) Anger (1) Ankles (1) anti-seizure meds (1) antibiotics (3) anticoagulant (3) Anxiety (6) appetite (4) Aranesp (3) Arixtra (3) Arizona (1) artichokes (1) Asparagus (3) asthma (13) Ativan (1) Atropine (2) Auntie (2) B6 (3) Banner Baywood (6) Bard Power Port (2) Barium (3) Barley (1) Barry White (1) bats (2) Benadryl (6) beneficiaries (1) Bewitched (1) Biohazard (1) Blizzard (2) BlizzCon (2) Blogger (1) blood clots (5) blood pressure (1) blood transfusion (1) bone cancer (2) Bone Pain (6) Bookworm (1) bougainvillea (2) brain tumors (3) Bras (1) bread (1) breast cancer (1) Breathe Healthy Mask (1) breathing (2) breathing treatment (3) broccoli (1) bronchitis (5) bruising (1) brussels sprouts (1) Cabin Fever (1) Camptosar (18) Cancer (9) Carboplatin (5) care-givers (1) Casserole (1) Cat (1) Cataclysm (1) Catholic School (1) Cellulitis (2) Change (1) chemo brain (1) Chemo Side Effects (6) Chemotherapy (34) chicken breasts (1) chicken broth (1) Chihuahuas (8) children (1) chili (1) chili peppers (1) Chinese food (1) Chocolate (2) chocolate cake (1) choose hope (1) Christmas (3) Christopher Hitchens (1) Cinemagic (3) Cinnamon (1) Cisco (1) claustrophobia (1) clinical trials (3) cockatoo (1) Coffee (5) Cold (5) collard greens (1) Color (1) comments (1) communication (1) Compazine (3) compliance (1) Compression Stockings (1) Congenstive Heart Failure (1) constipation (1) conversation (1) cooking (2) Coolaroo (1) COPD (1) COPD International (1) cornbread (2) coughing (7) coumadin (9) Courtesy (1) CPAP (1) cravings (5) creativity (1) Crock Pot (1) CT Scan (16) Cumin (1) cupcakes (2) Curiosity (1) Daniel Sepulveda (1) death (1) Decadron (13) Deep Vein Thrombosis (2) Denial of Coverage (1) dental procedures (5) Depression (2) Desert (1) Diablo III (2) Diabo II (1) disabilities (1) Dizziness (1) Dorothy (1) Doubts (1) Doxycycline (5) Dr. Fastenberg (12) Dr. Ramaswamy (9) Dr.Ono (1) Dragon Age II (2) Dreams (1) Druid (2) dry mouth (2) Duchess of Dim-Wittedness (1) dungeon runs (1) Dust Storm (1) DVT (1) dying at home (1) Echocardiogram (3) edema (1) elderly neighbor (1) Elizabeth Edwards (1) emotional baggage (1) end of life discussion (1) Ensure (1) Equinox (1) ER (2) esophageal cancer (16) Evelyn Lyles (2) Evil Tumor (1) Excessive Heat Warning (1) Exhaustion (4) eyebrows (1) fajitas (1) Fall (2) family (6) Famotidine (1) Fatigue (6) FDA (1) fear (10) feeding tube (1) fire drill (1) FitFlops (1) fluids (1) flying cars (1) Fondaparinux Sodium (2) food (1) Food Network (1) fountain (1) Fried Esophagus (1) friends (2) Game of Thrones (1) Garam Masala (1) gardening (1) Genentech (1) General Motors (1) George Foreman Grill (1) glass of wine (1) glucerna (4) glucose numbers (5) Goblin (1) goopiness (4) Grace (1) grains (1) Gratitude (1) Great Horned Owl (3) grief (1) groggy (1) Hair changes (4) Hair loss (5) Halloween (3) Hand-Foot Syndrome (6) handicapped placard (1) happiness (4) Hawaii (1) Hazardous Materials (1) HBO (1) healer classes (2) Health Insurance (5) heart rate (1) heat (4) heating pad (1) Help Desk (1) Henna (1) heparin (2) Her2 (1) Herceptin (29) hibiscus (4) home (2) hominy (2) Horde (1) hospice care (3) Hospital (6) hot tea (1) Howard Shore (1) humidity (1) hummus (2) Hunter (1) Hydrangeas (1) Ice Cream (1) IKEA (1) incurable (1) India (1) Infection (1) Infusion (2) Infusion port (3) inoperable cancer (2) insomnia (4) Iodine (5) Ironwood Cancer and Research Center (12) Jake (1) Jane Sepulveda (2) Januvia (1) Jerry Sepulveda (1) Jetsons (1) joy (1) Julie (1) Jury Duty (1) Kashi (1) King Crab (1) kitchen (1) knitted hats (2) krill oil (1) Lasix (3) Laughter (1) leave of absence (1) leaves (1) leg swelling (1) Levaquin (6) LIFE (1) Lifespan (1) lightning (2) Living (1) Living Will (1) Lord of the Rings (1) Los Angeles (1) loss of appetite (1) love (3) Lumbar Support (1) Lunar Eclipse (2) lymph nodes (1) Maalox (1) Machaca Chicken (1) magnesium (1) Malm (1) mastectomy (1) Master Chef (1) Medco (1) Medical Oncologist (3) memories (1) mental health (2) menudo (1) Military Macaw (1) Millet (1) Minions (2) Miracle Mouthwash (1) MMORPG (1) monsoons (4) Moonstone (1) Mormon (1) Mornings (1) mortality (2) mouth sores (1) Movies (1) Muesli (4) Mufuletta (1) Naprosyn (4) nausea (5) nebulizer (4) Necklace (1) negativity (1) neighbors (1) nervous cough (1) nervous tic (1) Netbook (1) Neulasta (7) neuroses (2) neutropenia (1) New Orleans (1) Nintendo DS (1) normalcy (1) nose sores (1) NSAID (1) Nuns (2) nurses (4) Nursing Uniform (1) NuStep (6) nutrition (3) Nuts (1) ocular migraine (3) oncologist (1) Oncologists (4) Oncology Nurse (6) optimism (1) Orcs (2) Outback Steakhouse (1) oxygen saturation (2) Pac Man (1) pagan (1) Pain (22) painting (2) palliative care (1) pancakes (1) Panic attack (1) Parsnips (1) pearls (1) Percocet (2) Peridot (1) Pesto (1) PET Scan (15) Petunias (2) Phenergan (2) Phlebotomist (9) physiology (1) Pico Sepulveda (1) pills (2) pink fedora (1) Platelets (1) playing (1) Poang Chair (1) Point Loma (1) Polly (1) posole (1) Post-chemo insomnia (3) Power Outage (1) Prednisone (15) prescriptions (1) Procrit (1) prognostications (1) Project Runway (1) protein (1) PT/INR (9) Pulmonary embolism (4) pulmonologist (4) pulse oxymeter (1) Pumpkin (2) Purple Fedora (2) Queen of Neuroses (11) quilts (1) Quinoa (2) Quito (1) Radiation Oncologist (10) radiation pneumonitis (2) Radiation Therapy (20) Rain (3) ravioli (1) reading (1) red cabbage (1) red meat (1) red wine (2) remission (1) rest (1) Rib Eye Roast (2) Rice (2) Rice Pudding (2) risks (1) Roomba (1) Rozerem (1) Ruth Sepulveda (1) saguaro (1) salmon (1) Samhain (2) Sarcastic Bitch (1) scarlet macaw (1) scooter (5) See's Candy (1) shots (1) side effects (3) Sinus Infection (1) sisters (3) Skin changes (1) Skyrim (1) sleep (8) slug (1) slumgullion (1) snow (1) snow crab (1) Snowbirds (1) soil (1) soup (1) Southern Baptist Church (1) spinach (1) Spirituality (2) Spring (1) Sprouts (3) Squash (12) Stage IV (1) Stencil (1) Steroids (2) stew (1) stomach (1) Strep Throat (1) stroke (1) Stuffed Mushrooms (1) subconscious (1) summer (1) sundial (1) Sunlight (1) Support Group (1) support socks (1) Surgeon (1) surgery (1) Survival Rate (3) swallowing (2) syringes (1) Tassimo (1) Tauren (2) Taxol (7) Taxotere (1) tea (1) Teeth (1) telecommuting (3) Templates (1) Temporal Thermometer (1) TGIF (1) Thanksgiving (2) The Apothecary Shop (3) Therapist (1) thigh tumor (1) Thrift Stores (1) throat changes (2) thunder (1) Tibetan Monk (1) Tiller Joe (1) tiramisu (1) tomatoes (3) Torchwood (1) Tortellinis (1) Tortilla soup (3) Toxic (2) Trick or Treat (1) Tripe (1) Troll Druid (2) tumor pictures (1) tumor shrinkage (2) tumors (1) Turmeric (2) TV (2) Undead Rogue (1) US Navy (1) USS Nereus (1) vancomycin (1) vegetables (6) Veggie burrito (1) veggies (3) Veterans' Day (1) vicodin (9) vinnie the vampire (1) visitors (2) Walgreen's (1) Walker (5) water color crayons (1) Water Color Pencils (4) weakness (4) weather (1) Weekends (1) weight (1) Wendy (1) Wheat Berries (1) Whimpering (1) white blood cell counts (2) Winter Solstice (4) wit (1) wooziness (1) work (21) World of Warcraft (27) writing (1) Xanax (10) Xeloda (35) Xoom (3) Xopenex (1) Xylitol (3) Yogurt (1) YouTube (1) zofran (3) Zombie Tequila (1) zucchini (1)