Sunday, May 8, 2011

May Flowers

The hydrangeas have survived two days in Arizona, although they were looking a little droopy this morning.  A quick application of water had them springing back in shape in no time.


I'm having to watch how I think.  Since my visit with Dr. F on Thursday, I've been catching myself thinking about things in the future, and then reminding myself that I may not be around for that.  I don't want to do this.  I just want to live today, and whatever happens or doesn't... that's fine.  There's no sliding bar hanging over me that says I'm going to die by a specific date and time.  And I'm just not going to be DYING until I actually die.  Until then, baby, I'm LIVING!  So it's just a matter of halting that time-schedule self talk and reprogramming myself back to now.  


Because seriously, what has changed?  Just because they found another cancer doesn't mean I can't control the esophageal AND the adrenal.  The only thing that HAS changed is that I have to do the nasty chemo again, and it'll be done in a few weeks, then I'll be back to 'normal,' until we have to do it again somewhere down the road.  As long as there IS a down the road, it's all golden. :)


I have to take a couple of Decadron tabs the day before, the day of, and the day after chemo.  Back to watching my glucose like a hawk. :D


But back on the flower front, we're seeing some sprouting of the dahlias and the crocosmias.  I can't wait!  Both of these make splendid cutting flowers.  I can have fresh flowers in the house for most of the summer and fall!!


Wendy got me to play a new game:  Deathspank.  Yes, it's a parody of action adventure type games a la Diablo II and Torchlight.  It's hilarious.  Reminds me of "George of the Jungle" type cartoons from my ill-spent youth. :D


Tomorrow it's back to work, telecommuting for a while, at least until this round of chemo is over.  I'll be susceptible to infection again, and anything else that would like to get a foot-hold on my body; like I don't have enough invaders on board. ;)


Tonight, we'll be having a grilled, marinated pork loin, rice and artichoke heart salad and some other veggie choice which shall be made closer to eating time.  Happy Mother's Day to all you breeders out there.  I miss my mother, but she had a good run for most of her life.


Love to all!

1 comment:

  1. Hey Girl
    It is hard to quiet the mind, it has a mind of its own so to speak. I guess the only thing to do is what you have been doing, when you catch yourself wandering off, just pull it back.

    My hydrangeas are doing good too, although like you they seem to need a fair bit of watering. We do not have irrigation up here, so it is the hose pipe every now and again as well as whatever rain they can get. I am looking forward to them getting big so I can cut them and bring them inside.
    Anyway, take it easy with work, stay strong
    Fay in the family room

    ReplyDelete

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