Friday, March 16, 2012

Thank You and I Love You

I’m having my sister post this.  It will be the last entry into the blog.  I’m gone, now, but what a wonderful time I had!  Oh sure, the last bits were not much fun, but the great life I have had certainly counted for much more in the scheme of things.

To my family:  No other people could have loved me, nor taken care of me with such grace of spirit, nor such generosity and consideration.  I know it was hard on you; lots of times, harder on you than me.  I can’t say don’t grieve, because that’s a normal part of the process of dealing with loss, but as soon as you can, start to laugh.  Call Polly.  She’ll make you laugh, and she’ll need to laugh as well.  I want you to remember that I loved to laugh and I loved to smile, so do your best. J

I do not have to tell you how much I loved and will continue to love each of you.  I hope I showed you this as I lived.

To my friends:  The support and love you all gave me through this most challenging of journeys was astounding.  You know, Facebook was a good thing; I got to make sure that the people I cared about were kept in the loop… a crappy loop, to be sure, but a loop nonetheless.  Some days, your words of encouragement were all that was between me and abysmal despair.  Your positivity fueled mine and just knowing you were there for me and knowing how much you were rooting for me; well, that strengthened my resolve to keep fighting. 

But the fight is over, and as we all must, I have gone on to continue the journey.  Where the journey progresses is anyone’s guess, but one thing of which I have continued to be certain, there is nothing about which to be afraid.

Special thanks to all the people at Arizona Family Hospice; I felt such love and caring from each of you as you made my transition fearless and mostly painless. J

Dr. Fastenberg, my medical oncologist, thank you for always being up-front about everything. You are one of the rare breed of caring oncologists, and I adore you.
Dr. Ramaswamy, you treated me with compassion, intelligence and great humor; and you know I love humor.  Best of all, both you and Dr. Fastenberg treated me as a fully-fledged, intelligent member of the team, and for that I love you both.

And as I have exhorted you all in the past, when you love someone let them know; when you find someone to be charming, let them know; when someone does something that makes you happy, tell them.  Share love, share happiness, share peace.


  1. She will be missed. A facinating and beautiful woman, a rare gem. I will be praying for peace in the hearts of those blessed enough to have known her well.

    Thank you for letting those of us who loved her from afar know that she cared so well that she`d not forget to let us know. Beautiful to the very last detail.

    For those who take comfort from the scriptures:
    Psalm 55:22
    Romans 15:13

    For those who do not:
    I hope you may take comfort in knowing, as you hold her memories, she, all the best of her, will never truly be gone. Thank you for loving her.

  2. I will miss you girlfriend. I asked my husband, who knew you, if I would have liked you had we met. He said "oh yeah, she was really cool, you would have liked her a lot".
    Safe journey my friend and I hope it is everything you hoped it would be.
    Fay in the family room

  3. It is hard to know what to say. Tequila says it all. My prayers and heart go out to the family and the people closest to her. what an amazing person she was. Trying to give to others as she went through this illness. Trying to show us that we must not fear when we make our own journey. God Bless all. Tequila,may you rest in peace lady, you job is done.

  4. May your hearts soon be filled with wonderful memories of joyful times together as you celebrate a life well lived.
    Rest in peace, Tequila.

    Eileen G, COPD International

  5. I am so sorry to hear of Tequila's passing. She will remain in the hearts and minds of many people who had the privlige of knowing this amazing woman, even those who never met her. We got to know her through her words of bravery and encouragement to everyone. RIP Tequila. You are one VERY SPECIAL WOMAN.

    Thoughts and Prayers to all who know and loved Tequila.


  6. I am so very sorry; and so saddened by the loss of such a wonderful woman.

    Grace, dignity, compassion, kindness, love of life; an abundance of it all and then some..... I know that I'm a better person for having met her.

    Rest well dear lady; you have earned it.

    Jackie Whitaker, COPD Canada Patient Network

  7. She has left us with a wonderful lesson...each day find something in your life that is good...even if it's only a warm pack on your shoulder. Such a LADY this woman was. I wish I could have met her in person. I only hope I can travel my journey with as much grace as she did. Travel safely now, Tequila. We'll see you later!

    PennyPA, COPD Boards

  8. What a beautifully written final piece by such a lovely, spirited individual. Your wisdom and bravery is an inspiration. I wish you peace. Prayers for the family~

  9. What a wonderful person who has allowed us to share in her experience from the beginning to end. One class act! Prayers to the family members who have been left behind.

    SandraFL, COPD International Board

  10. Such a special woman who will be greatly missed. I'm so terribly sad to learn of her death, but at least Tequila is out of pain now. She was an inspiration and a joy to 'know' even though I only knew her through reciprocal blog contact. May she rest in peace, and may all her family and 'irl' friends have peace in Tequila's death too. Love to you all. Becky xx

  11. Sweet dreams. Please guide us through our remaining years here. We will be with you soon.

  12. Beautiful words from a beautiful friend. I hope all of you are taking care of each other, and know that she will be much missed.

  13. Yes, My Friend, you will be missed terribly!! You have always been such a positive influence in my life and for that, I thank you. As always, your words are both comforting and wise - always thinking of others. Rest easy, Teq, and know that you are loved deeply! My thoughts and prayers are with your sisters and entire family as they grieve. I hope that I will be able to be there for them in any way needed - a shoulder to cry on or to provide some much needed laughter. As we have always agreed, the old saying "laughter is the best medicine" is so true. Goodbye and Safe Journey, Dear Friend. I love you! Polly

  14. Sweet dreams dear friend. Rest easy and I will see you again some day. My deepest sympathy to your family.

    Love, Bev

  15. Dearest Tequila,
    The world was a better place with you in it.
    Those of us who were so extreamly fortunate to have known you are better people because we knew you.
    You instilled in us inspiration on so many levels.
    The worst part of the jouney is over now.It is done.
    Only the best parts of the jouney lie ahead.
    You will be missed beyond words.
    Always in our hearts,minds and prayers.
    Enjoy all those who waited for you.
    Rest well.See you there.

  16. Well, it has been almost 4 months. Everyday she is in my thoughts. I cannot tell you all how many times I have seen or heard something and thought " I have to share this with T".
    We are doing fine here in AZ. Am leaving this blog up in the hopes that others may benefit from T's amazing journey. We miss and love her very much.

  17. I just found out she was gone today. I feel sad that I didn't keep in touch with her enough. She was a friend and a mentor. I spent one of the best years learning from her. I learned how to laugh when there is not much to laugh about, how to enjoy life and how to be a friend. She said I reminded her of a little brother. She was the big sister I never had. T, I'm sorry I didn't keep in touch, we'll meet again someday. Thank you for being you... GM

  18. Well, it has been a year. A long one, with many good and some bad things. T would have been so proud of Wendy getting her BSN, and a job at the Hospital of her choice. I too am more proud of her than words can express. We are good here in AZ.
    Although I must confess, this week has been the most difficult of all since we lost her. I still miss her most days. We can all be assured that she is watching over us, with all of our departed loved ones. In a bar this week for St. Patrick's Day :)

  19. I miss you and Pico. JD in KC



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