Thursday, January 12, 2012

Hospice

I made the decision today to apply to hospice.  My oncolgist says all we can do now is try to give good palliative care, and we're going to go through the course of radiation on the bone cancer, and the radiation on the brain.  This way, I can have a good quality of life with what's left, and not have to go back through the torture of chemo that doesn't work.

I got through the initial brain radiation, and it wasn't of course as bad as my antipation of the terror.  I did come home with waffle marks all over my face from the evil mask they snap onto your head and adhere to the table.  You WILL NOT MOVE!  Jane says they were more like honeycombs.

One of the ladies I always see while waiting for radiaion brought several of us homemade bread.  Mine is blueberry and carrot.  It was still warm, and very fragrant.  And MY was it fabulous.  I grabbed a hunk to eat on the way home.  This is same woman who knitted me a purple hat because I didn't have one.  She's a snowbird from Michigan.  An angel of a woman.

So, my primary care doc, Dr. Ramaswamy is going to get the hospice stuff started.  We will probably wait until both rounds of radiation are finished.  But I can't tell you how relieved and happy I am at making the decision.  I no longer have to go through treatments that ultimately don't work, but torture me in the meantime.  I can concentrate on my job, my family, my friends, my doga and help them undertand that this is the very best decision I can make right now.  And I am happy!

I'll keep you up to date on my progress as we take this journey; I am almost excited to see where we'll go.

Love and hugs to all!

3 comments:

  1. Girl
    I am sure you are doing the right thing. I have heard some wonderful things about hospice. My sister had a bit of experience with it. The people who treated her were very nice, she was in a hospital setting, but it was cool. Not the same as being at home though.

    Will you be at home, I do so hope so, you need your family around you.

    I just feel so very sad that it has to come to this. It makes me so very, very, very angry that no-one has found a cure for cancer after all these years and all the billions of $$$$$.

    So, off on the next part of the adventure. I have to agree with you on that score. I think it would be like an adventure too. Where to next eh. Shit girl it has gotta be better than here, apart from family not being able to come, that bit sucks.

    Oh well, you keep posting, and I shall keep reading and commenting and sharing the journey until you get to that door and it opens. Then we shall have to say goodbye and you shall have to go on by yourself. I dread it.
    Chins up girlfriend
    fay in the family room

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tequila, Our hospice people are wonderful and they help immensely with pain management. They are all about making you as comfortable as you can be. We have been using hospice for over a year now so it doesn't have to mean the end is near ... in Ronnie's case he qualifies because he has a continuing decline. I hope your hospice team is as wonderful as ours. Many hugs to you and your family as you continue on this journey. You are such a brave lady and a true inspiration to others. Julie-GA copd international

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lady Polly PurebredJanuary 13, 2012 at 10:46 AM

    Hello My Dear Friend, called but you were sleeping. I just want you to know that I don't intend to say goodbye to you anytime soon, so you keep those positive juices flowing and we'll keep the laughter and prayers gushing your way. I am a firm believer in a positive attitude and positive thoughts, so along with your Hospice caregivers and what they can provide, you will be overwhelmed with goodness in your life. We want to get together and share a glass of wine.....or 2, so you tell us when you feel up to it and we are on our way! I think an afternoon of laughter, joy and some red, red wine would do us all some good, don't you? :-} Love Ya, Polly

    ReplyDelete

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