Cough... Cough

Well, whatever this malady is that is now affecting my lungs, it seems to be pretty tenacious.  I had lots of liquids today, some chicken soup, and still, the goopiness persists.


Doc called to tell me to stop the coumadin for a couple of days because my INR was up to 5.  Ai carumba!  Don't get a paper-cut, or bang your knee on a table.   I have to go in to see him on Monday afternoon.  Got more lab testing on Monday morning; the regular PT/INR and then my pre-chemo stuff, the CBC and platelets with differentials.


The worry I have is that they won't let me do my chemo on Tuesday if this coughing is still active.  Although, frankly, I can't see how it will make a difference.  But that's me... I worry.


Oh yes, I am sucking on my hookah again.  I figure if I do it just before I try to get to bed, I should have a better chance at getting to sleep, despite being wired up.  Much easier to sleep when you can breathe. :)


Sometimes it just gets overwhelming, the things you have to do to try to survive cancer.  My left leg is swelling again, at the foot and ankle.  I was hoping that would go away with the coumadin and the dissolving of the DVT.  Maybe it is just going to take longer than I want.  At least the pain in my thigh is a thing of the past.


Then, there's the watching of the glucose levels, my heart rate, my oxygen saturation, my temperature, my weight, the condition of my feet and my hands, and good gods, how on earth do we survive as a species?  We're so complicated and have so many systems that can break down!


I need to go get new glasses, but my vision changes almost every day.  That's the chemo.  It's just all so weird.


But, it's time to try to get some sleep.  Monday is Samhain, or Halloween, and I have lots and lots of family and other loved ones that have passed beyond this world, and I want to honor them and remember them and ensure they know that  death doesn't end the loving.  


Peace and love.

I Love Fall

I think Fall is by far my favorite season.  Even here, we have leaves changing colors; certainly not as showy and impressive as over in New England, but it's here, nonetheless.


Today, I'll be heading off to see the oncologist at 1PM, then if all is well with my labs, I can have my Camptosar infusion.  How amazing that after being so skittish in the beginning of this treatment regimen, now, I WANT it!  Doesn't matter that it makes me nauseated; it's saving my life, and I want it.  Oooh, that sounds like a three-year-old, doesn't it?  I WANT IT!  :D


On the other hand, this means the beginning of my Xeloda cycle, too.  You know, I'm exceedingly lucky, because other than the nausea, I'm not getting the more harsh side effects from these two chemo drugs.  Oh well, yes, there IS that little problem with blood clots, but I was lucky there, too!  That Pulmonary Embolism was found before it killed me.  That's luck!


But perhaps, luck has nothing to do with it.  I know I have so many supporters out there; family, friends, even strangers I have never physically met.  With all those prayers, good mojo, best wishes and love, you know that HAS to play a part in my so-called 'luck.'  And I am most appreciative of every bit of support that comes my way.


Our house is now decorated for Halloween.  We have a HORRIBLE giant spider on the front porch, and his web is full of plastic cockroaches.  I kinda helped out yesterday, putting cockroaches in the web, but frankly, they kept sliding and looked FAR too real for my taste, but in the spirit of the season, they are perfect.


Jane made another batch of cupcakes yesterday with my favorite Chocolate Cream Cheese frosting, but instead of cocoa powder, which we didn't have, we used Mexican Chocolate... with cinnamon.  Holy carp, these cupcakes are to die for.  And if I eat too many, I will. :)  The cake part is spice cake, too, so believe me, the Mexican in us is VERY happy with these cupcakes.


So that's it for this post.  All is well, and if anything comes up at the oncologist today, I'll let you all know.


Love, hugs and kisses, too!

Quilted with Love

There is just something about a hand-made quilt, made especially for YOU, that makes you feel all warm and glowy inside.  I received a package in the mail today, from California.  Inside was a very tactilely (yes I do make up new words with alarming frequency) delicious quilt with pink velvet (hey, it could be velour, but all I know is, it's SO soft!) on one side, and amazing quilting on the other side.

This thoughtful gift came from my niece, Sandi, my great niece Lindsay and my Sister-in-Law Pat.  I call it thoughtful, because Sandi explained that a friend of hers had gone through something similar to me, and she knew that the chemo room was going to be cold as ice.  And indeed, I had already been warned by the nurse during my 'chemo class' that it might be a good idea to bring a blanket.

Interestingly enough, the last time someone made me a beautiful quilt was when I had breast cancer.  Two friends of mine, Vicki and Judy, who both belonged to the company quilting club, had worked on it while I was out on leave, and when I got back, they brought it to me at my desk.  How lovely to know that people think of you enough to do something that requires such skill, and time!  I STILL get misty-eyed about that quilt.  So in receiving today's package, I not only felt the love from my out of state family, but I experienced the remembered love from the first quilt. How lucky am I?

The original quilt features bright, saturated colors and fabric depicting parrots and other birds.  Before my lungs started having major problems, I had done parrot rescue and had several of the intelligent creatures gracing my life.  So, Vicki and Judy knew I would love that fabric.  I love it so much, I redid my bedroom in complementary colors so that I could mount the parrot quilt on my wall.  It's a reminder that no matter how difficult things become in one's life, you can always find beauty and love.

Well, tomorrow is port surgery day, so I guess I should try to get some sleep. 

Thank you again, Sandi, Lindsay and Pat.  I love you, my dear family.