Cough... Cough

Well, whatever this malady is that is now affecting my lungs, it seems to be pretty tenacious.  I had lots of liquids today, some chicken soup, and still, the goopiness persists.


Doc called to tell me to stop the coumadin for a couple of days because my INR was up to 5.  Ai carumba!  Don't get a paper-cut, or bang your knee on a table.   I have to go in to see him on Monday afternoon.  Got more lab testing on Monday morning; the regular PT/INR and then my pre-chemo stuff, the CBC and platelets with differentials.


The worry I have is that they won't let me do my chemo on Tuesday if this coughing is still active.  Although, frankly, I can't see how it will make a difference.  But that's me... I worry.


Oh yes, I am sucking on my hookah again.  I figure if I do it just before I try to get to bed, I should have a better chance at getting to sleep, despite being wired up.  Much easier to sleep when you can breathe. :)


Sometimes it just gets overwhelming, the things you have to do to try to survive cancer.  My left leg is swelling again, at the foot and ankle.  I was hoping that would go away with the coumadin and the dissolving of the DVT.  Maybe it is just going to take longer than I want.  At least the pain in my thigh is a thing of the past.


Then, there's the watching of the glucose levels, my heart rate, my oxygen saturation, my temperature, my weight, the condition of my feet and my hands, and good gods, how on earth do we survive as a species?  We're so complicated and have so many systems that can break down!


I need to go get new glasses, but my vision changes almost every day.  That's the chemo.  It's just all so weird.


But, it's time to try to get some sleep.  Monday is Samhain, or Halloween, and I have lots and lots of family and other loved ones that have passed beyond this world, and I want to honor them and remember them and ensure they know that  death doesn't end the loving.  


Peace and love.

Hookah Power!

It's 4:33AM and I am using my nebulizer once again.  Actually, I am doing MUCH better since yesterday morning when I went to get my PT/INR.  I had to take the scooter because I was WAY too weak to walk.  That's nothing to worry about; mostly a combination of the chemo and this cold I have that is running its course.  I hope to be back to walking on Thursday when I have to return to the lab for more blood-letting.

There really is nothing new and exciting to tell you about for this post, but I wanted to let you all know that I am feeling better.  And most happily, my breakfast dose of Xeloda this morning will be the last of this round, and then I have my chemo week OFF. :)  YAY, I need a break.

My hands are definitely beginning to feel the effects of Hand-Foot Syndrome.  There are many things I can't do with my hands at the moment, like open bottles, make coffee (our carafe's handle, the one we fill with water to pour into the coffee maker, has a very uncomfortable handle for me.)  It hurts to grasp anything, which is a bit problematic for someone who, when she walks either uses a cane or a walker.  But the good news is that Hand-Foot Syndrome clears up once the chemotherapy drugs are withdrawn.  So, I shall just suck it up. :)

And that's it.  I'm looking forward to Halloween on Monday; hopefully we will have trick or treaters, and I can watch them from a distance. 

Love and hugs to all.

Ugh, no Sleeping

I had to get up and do a breathing treatment, and if you know anything about albuterol, which is what I nebulize in my hookah, you know it makes your heart race, and wires you for sound.  For instance, I'm sitting here at my computer, and my HR is 122, and I can't stop shaking my left leg.... that's one way to get exercise, I guess. ;)


So, I've been playing World of Warcraft.  I just mute my system so I don't wake up the whole household.  There seem to be plenty more insomniacs on line tonight, so I was enjoying a chat with Smacky, a very handsome Orc warrior that is totally epic'd out.  He had kindly notified me that a rare was up, if I was interested in taming it as a pet, since I was on Kauket, my lovely Orc Hunter.  Alas, I would have needed some druid back up, and since I had just started the Firelands quests on Kauket, I did not have them at my disposal.  And believe me, Kauket is NOT epic'd out. :)


Playing World of Warcraft (WoW) when you are having trouble breathing serves an important purpose; it helps me relax, believe it or not.  That way, I stop getting anxious and feeling impending doom.  Anxiety is the worst thing you can develop in the face of an asthma episode.  And yet, it's almost always going to happen because let's face it, it's scary when you can't breathe!  But with the anxiety comes more shortness of breath.


I like to use both WoW and the power of numbers to keep me from getting too neurotic.  For instance, I have my Pulse Oxymeter, which tells me my HR and my Oxygen saturation level (the level of oxygenation in my blood).  Obviously, if my O2 level is showing at 99%, I am in really good shape.  And the breathing treatment that I did earlier is having good results.  I got a little worried I'd be heading to the ER this evening, but I think I'm going to be fine.  I'll just keep an eye on my sats.


Now, I guess since I am nowhere near being able to sleep, I should return to World of Warcraft.


Peace!

Coming up on Number Five

Tuesday will begin round five of the clinical trial chemos.  Blech.  Funny how you can make yourself do something that makes you so sick.  It's the promise of cancer redemption that keeps you going.  I'd like to think, too, that doing this trial is helping other people as well.  Stage I of this trial helped define the dosage tolerances.  I'm not sure what Stage II is doing, but whatever it is, we're doing it!


I had a dream last night; Jane had a weird screen saver on her computer's display.  I told her it was creepy because it was exactly like an ocular migraine.  Then I woke up... and was having an ocular migraine. :P


Having read about my cupcake cravings, Jane and Nancy came home with ingredients and made a batch of red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting.  And of course, I was done with my cupcake cravings.  But did I say NO to those pretty little things?  Heaven forbid!  Must eat those things made with love, you know.  Just don't eat five of them. :)


Last night saw a deluge of rain.  My sister-in-law, Julie, had called to say they had hail, really high winds and their power was out.  Julie lives ESE of us, and while we were on the phone, our house had blue skies and a light breeze, but you could see, off in the distance, a lot of dark thunderheads.


About an hour later, we got the deluge; no hail, plenty of wind and so much rain you couldn't see across the street.  It lasted probably fifteen minutes, and when I put the dogs out around Nine PM, my back yard was dry.  We really needed that rain!  I think it's still considered part of monsoon season, here, and it was quite a show with all the lightning.


So, I'm approaching Tuesday with trepidation, since the toxicity of the chemos is building up and it's taking me longer each time to start to feel human.  But I can't stop now; I'm in the home stretch!  I'll just learn to nap more.


Now it's time to hit the hookah (my pet name for my nebulizer) because it's humid and I have a hard time breathing when the air feels like a sauna.  Funny, when I lived in California, the spa my mom and I went to every day after work for our exercise regimen had a sauna, and I LOVED it!  Of course, I hadn't been diagnosed with asthma yet, back then.  Who knew I'd move to Arizona and get to experience wide-spread sauna-like conditions? :)  Luckily, we're USUALLY a dry heat.


Alrighty, then.  Have a fabulous week, all.  Kiss a puppy, or a kitty, or your spouse. :)