Yeah, it's catching up with me...

It's not like they didn't warn me.  My esophagus is fried, and it's killing me.  OK, that's a bit of an exaggeration.  But it does hurt.  I guess it's time to get that Magic Mouthwash prescription filled.  I just sipped some water and that didn't hurt too badly, so maybe after today's and the next two days' radiations we can take a break.

I have to see Dr. Tsai today after radiation.  I'll tell her I am finally getting the predicted irritation of the esophagus.  I just wish it didn't wake me up so much during the night.

OK, I have to tell you the music on Cinemagic right now is really GOOD, even though it's from "Speed 2:  Cruise Control."  It's composed by Mark Mancina.  Just excellent.

I know this blog is starting to sound like a whining session, but my neck and shoulder are all screwed up, too.  I miss my bi-weekly massage sessions!

So, yeah, all in all, I'm pretty miserable today.  But other than that, I woke up breathing, so that's a good sign.

Now, I'll go see if the mail is here... I can use a walk.  I've been neglecting my NuStep quite horribly.  I'm sure that's not helping my miserability. :D

Well, be happy, all... see you tomorrow.

Sometimes I forget...

...how bad I feel over the weekend.  I assume it's the chemo from Thursday working its way out of my body.  Saturday is the worst; I get dizzy, weak, and can't get warm.  I feel like I have the flu, or... here's a great word:  Ague.  I can't concentrate on anything. 

By Sunday, it's starting to dissipate, although I still feel weak, I'm not so dizzy.  The dizziness is a pain.  I have to use a walker just to get around the house.  But I remember once when Evelyn actually fell and hit her jaw on her kitchen counter and had to have stitches, so ... I'll use the walker. 

It's a bit overcast today.  And we have a bad air alert.  Of course, it's a no-burn day, and I just put my dogs out, and someone definitely is using their fireplace.  *cough*

I bought myself a tin of 36 water color pencils, so maybe if I feel better later, I'll go play with them.  Right now, though, I think I'll just go lie down for a while and maybe have a nap... a nap before 9AM... how odd. ;)

Keep warm, all, be safe and be happy.

Saw Pulmonary Doc Yesterday

... and was he ever happy with my progress.  I think of all the doctors, he was the most taken aback by the esophageal cancer diagnosis.  He kept telling me how amazed he was that I was doing so well, considering how debilitating my treatment regimen can be.

It had been three months since I had seen him, and I had lost 10 lbs, but he said my lungs really sounded great for me. :)  Now I don't have to return to him for four months. 

I had radiation number TWENTY-FIVE yesterday!  Some days, it's hard to drag yourself out there every single week day, but hey, it keeps you alive, so you do it.  And it's not like I have to drive to Peoria or someplace on the west side.  The only problem is surviving the commute through the snowbirds.  Sometimes, they do ... odd things... with their vehicles.

Jane just got up and decided we needed to have pancakes for breakfast.  Ok, that gets my vote.  Better check my glucose first.  My poor glucose numbers get all out of whack after chemo.  Usually by Saturday we're back in my normal range.  And hooray, we are indeed. :D

I have a little One Touch Ultra Mini glucose meter... in pink.  It's fast and very accurate.  They were using it for pre-pet scan testing at East Valley Diagnostic Imaging, and I thought it was ... cute.. and FAST!  So, I went to their website and got a free one.  Oh yes, they can give you a free meter because believe me, they make up their costs in the profits from the test strips.

Well, I hear pancake production has begun in the kitchen, so I must go investigate. ;)

Be happy, all... and keep warm!

Post-Chemo Insomnia

Not complaining, mind you, especially since the treatments seem to be working.  Still, I got tired of tossing and turning, so I thought I'd get up and do something productive, like write. :)

Jane told me she saw a commercial for Ironwood Cancer and Research Center, but not really a commercial; they were sponsoring something on PBS.  YAY for them!  My friend Mary from COPD International asked me if that was the Ironwood I go to, and yes, it is.  I go to the one in Mesa, though, since it's close to most of my other doctors.  I do have to say that traffic has picked up out that way since the advent of Fall.  The Snowbirds have arrived.  I think they double the population of that area.

Gosh, I'm feeling so optimistic after reading that last CT report.  I'm thinking I really CAN go back to work!  Maybe I'll have to have one of my sisters drive me and I can use my electric scooter.  I just worry that I won't be able to do 40 hours initally, but I know my manager will work with me on that.  I'll probably continue with the chemo and radiation for a while, and that definitely brings on some fatigue.  I can still telecommute, so that will help immensely!  Especially when my white counts drop like they have been and the risk of infection is high.

Dr. F caught me in the hall yesterday, while I was waiting for my radiation treatment.  He said that he had discussed surgery with Dr. Tsai the Radiation Oncologist and she definitely agreed that surgery was not an option.  Since Dr. E, my surgeon, had described the surgery for me, in really graphic and frightening detail, I have to say I am very relieved.  I told Dr. F that my fear was that I'd be on a ventilator, if I even survived, and that's not how I want to spend my last days.  I'm so happy that I can discuss things like this with my two wonderful Oncs. :)

Um, I made myself some coffee, and it's really WONDERFUL.  I'm definitely not driving to the Pulmonologist today.  Thank the gods I have my three sisters here.  I always have someone that will get me where I need to go.

Ah HAH, spell check is not working at 3:30am.  I just had to test it out, since it keeps telling me that I have no errors, and I know how I type at the best of times.  Either that or ADLOCIFY is a real word.  Maybe I should go look that up.

Oh well, I'll close this post now and go play World of Warcraft for a bit.  I have an Undead Hunter that needs to work on her Leatherworking profession. ;)

Keep warm, all, and don't forget to hug someone that needs it!

It's Social Chemo Day again...

...and boy is there a lot of socializing today.  I'm sitting with Donna and Suzy and we're just talking about our experiences.  Shared experiences help mitigate some of the fear inherent in all this stuff.  Both of these ladies have nasty, inoperable cancers, so they are in the same boat as I.  We're doing everything we can to get the most time with the people we love.  Oh, yes, and the chihuahuas. ;)

Jane and Nancy dropped me off, and headed out to the Thrift stores in search of treasures.  Sometimes the hunting is good, and sometimes, it's fruitless, but I think they have fun in the hunt alone.  Jane always waits to get my netbook set up before they leave. 

My new chair for my bedroom came yesterday.  Oh I love it.  Nice and sturdy, yet comfortable, and it makes me sit straight, which I need for better breathing.  Yes, I got it in that very green.  Green IS my favorite color.

Tomorrow I'll be off to see my lung doctor, and hopefully, he'll say that things on that front are just fine.  I think they are so far.  At least I feel like I'm moving air pretty well.

OK, now I need to go eat something.  I think I'll go peruse the 'snacks' that Ironwood provides....

Later, all!

We have SHRINKAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't know exactly the rate of shrinkage on the Evil Tumor itself, but I do have the measurements on one of the lymph nodes:  Original size was 25 x 25, yesterday it was 14 x 21.  Oh yeah, I'll take that!!!

Dr. F iterated that while I won't be cured, this is a good step toward control of the cancer. Unfortunately, though, my white counts are still too low, so we're doing half doses of Carboplatin and Taxol today.  Herceptin, on the other hand is still at full dose, and that's a very good thing.

So, the Benadryl is kicking in, and I'm getting groggy, so that's it for this post.

Love to EVERYONE! :)

Nuts

I like nuts.  They are really good for you, too.  I think having skipped a week of Chemo, I've gotten my appetite back, and now I am craving all kinds of things.  Nuts, for one.  So, I found some Blue Diamond Almonds, Jalapeno Smokehouse flavor.  Yummy!  I'm guessing with all the flavoring agents, NOT so good for you as the more natural ones, but dang, really good. ;)

Today will be radiation 23... five more to go!  I went and got my blood work done this AM, and asked for the hand warmer as soon as I got there, as I had been instructed two weeks ago by my phlebotomist.  Too bad it wouldn't fit under my glove, but oh, it was soooo nice, and it really did make a world of difference in getting my vein ready for tapping.

I'm quite happy with the folks at Sonora Quest, the lab I use every week.  They are considerate, mostly on time, and do a great job.  I always appreciate a phlebotomist that looks at the availability of your veins and decides you're too much of a challenge, then goes and gets someone else.  That is the mark of caring blood-letter. :D

Back to nuts.  I also got a bag of Planters Wicked Hot Chipotle Peanuts.  Now these are definitely hot, but not as good as the Blue Diamond.  Mostly, I think because of the nut factor itself.  I just like almonds better.  But cravings are cravings, and so, had to get the peanuts, too.

It should reach 70 today, so it's definitely a little more comfortable.  And of course, wearing a head-covering does indeed help keep your entire body warm.  I am sure I would have learned this at a much earlier age if I had grown up in Wisconsin or Michigan. ;)

Well, tomorrow it's back to Chemo.  My little netbook is ready, and I'm taking some Glucerna bars and .. I think I'll take my almonds!  Plus I have this great flavored water I like to sip on constantly during chemo, because of the hellacious dry mouth thing.  Just have to get past the Benadryl woooooziness, and it's all good.

So, I'll type to you all tomorrow, from chemo and let you know how it's going.  See you then; keep warm and give out some hugs!